It's Oh So Quiet... (joke thread)

[bill]

...as the old Bjork song goes. Never known such a quiet week on the forum. Is everyone okay?
So, a joke for you all.

A journalist gets a chance to interview a tribal elder in the deepest darkest rain forest. No one has ever interviewed anyone from this tribe so it's a proper scoop and he's rightly up for it.

After idle gossip, the journo asks the elder," do you have any funny stories to share?" The old boy smiles and starts...

"One day, a goat got lost in the rain forest. As is our tradition, all the men of the village gathered to drink much vodka. When we found the goat, as is our tradition, all the men of the village mated with the goat. We had such fun."

The journo realises he'll never get that to print so smiles and asks the old boy for another anecdote.

"One day, my neighbours wife got lost in the rain forest. As is our tradition, all the men of the village gathered to drink much vodka. When we found his wife, as is our tradition, all the men of the village mated with the wife. We had such fun."

The journo again realises he's no chance of printing that and asks the old boy for a slightly sadder, less funny story.

The old boys face turns solemn, tears well up in his eyes as he says..."One day, I got lost in the rain forest..."

I'm here all week.

[egpffqtv]

There’s nothing much to discuss these days thanks to AGS’ lack of delivery of new routes.

[Clive]

I just got sacked from the ice cream factory. I couldn’t work Sundays.

I got sacked from my job as a clairvoyant’s assistant. I didn’t see that coming.

Did you see my joke about my chiropractor problems? It was about a week back.

I want to thank you for explaining the word many to me. It means a lot.

I got ripped off. I paid a carpenter to make me a double bed and he’s done a bunk.

I’ve written a song about tortillas. Actually it’s more of a wrap.